“Woke Up Mortals”
This the day I’m gonna wake up some mortals,
Them accusations ‘bout as accurate as Bortles,
But it don’t disturb my rest, this heart is pure,
I love the hate, the definition of a cure.
All your talk is bishbait, that’s all I get,
You should be fishin’ but you’re caught up in the net,
My monstrousness is exposed, so come adore,
It used to be “free my spirit!” but I want more,
Free everybody within the Body.
I jump first, cuz God got me.
I watch pretenders makin’ Babel rabble arguments,
LARPing Catholic identity, like who are you, Vance?
I feel more Thomas so I gotta find my silence.
I heard the-
I cannot force you to see, don’t matter how I word it.
Here’s my vocation if you wanna know how I heard it.
Yes, Father.
“Go and make a mess.
Take up your cross, be forgivin’ and confess.”
Yes, Father.
“Keep your feet upon the way.
Never let them take your freedom and your play.”
…
“Keep your head up and laugh like I do,
And understand that your Abba loves a glad fool.”
…
“If it hurts your pride, let that die too.
Don’t be waitin’ for Nathan; that man is not you.”
Comin’ with a rap attack, chillin’ with my kitten, sippin’ Cap’n Jack,
This gon’ be that new rum.
Fuck apologetics, let’s all see you get dumb!
All that knowledge be a waste if we can’t learn to play,
Come and take a walk with me, but first we gotta pray.
Bless my group of little men, they’re banking on the system while I’m tryna game it,
See me possessed by the Spirit and they can’t tame it.
Used to take the counsel free, I’d help my little parish out,
IRNI came back onto the scene, I told my father “Ciao!”
Call me crazy, I’m Assisi, yeah let’s go,
Strip in front of all you squares, I’ll shed the wares and fancy clothes.
Saint Joe’s said "keep it hush", I thought I’d brush it off, but no;
A modern time chaplain told me where it happened like I wouldn’t know.
Watched the Super Bowl of ’99 beside my main abuser,
All you schemin’ Legionaries, I don’t know how you don’t lose your
Rites, frankly. Plenty of pickles, but they ain’t kosher,
Real damn shame this layman mightier without the crosier.
This is not hyperbole, I sure don’t want your settlements.
Maciel caressed my jowl, I live in prayer and penitence.
El? Si! Mal si mar y con poseidon!
Con conquistadors since the days of the Dickinsons.
What you face? Not what I faced. I’m impetiginous,
But no lost cause, I’m from the Lanc, reppin’ Thaddeus,
To my First Cause: Monsignor’s dead, and I’m glad he is
I pray for him, he prays for me, between Brutus and Cassius.
But the Legion’s still rollin’, Unc is in Jerusalem,
Saw him hanging out with Dolan, Imma bring the juice to them,
Can’t match my RPM, caught you playing hide-and-seek.
Piss you off and take a leak, I’m bringing the other cheek.
Yeah, father!
Go and make a mess!
Take up your cross, be forgiven, and confess!
Yeah, father!
Keep your feet upon the way!
Never let them take your freedom and your play!
Yeah, father!
Keep your head up and laugh like I do,
And understand that your Abba loves a glad fool!
Yeah, father!
If it hurts your pride, let that die too.
Don’t be waitin’ for Nathan; that man is not you.
Met up with my bishop couple months ago in Harrisburg,
He ain’t my first Tim Senior, but he’s the first who heard.
He said it don’t define, but that don’t sit well with me.
Before I lose my truth, I'll loose all the Hell in me.
If my memory got erased and took this cross from me,
I’d jeopardize my mission and even the crown above me.
It’s like they’re mad 'cause I decided not to stay dead,
Y'all keep on hedging all your bets, Imma say what I said.
Ain’t no Timothy here; this here’s a legionary.
It's a lot of positions, but not many are missionary,
2026 is here, time to grab the lectionary,
Tell 'em flip to Job and read how his story don’t end in there, he
Lost it all, but God got no blame, my poverty’s my insurance claim,
Tell the pope his year of hope (would you believe?) took all my shame!
Okay, Taylor, come bring your game, the Church’s infiltrator,
Universal bride, but you divide, and now my people hate her.
Oh and fuck Word on Fire! Like the Legion, see it go down.
Bishop Barron moving like Puff Daddy while standing with the First Clown.
I had hopes you’d maybe hop off the socials when you got pulled out of LA.
You’re better off hanging in Winona, that’s where your sheep are today.
Where’d Joey go, by the way?
Hey, fuck tryna act like you’re an ally while ignoring FKA!
Abuse of power is abuse of power, don’t matter where it may lay!
Byzantine, but not Greek to me,
Wormtongue Pig Latin all day,
Looking cut like Edoras pay?
What’s the word, EWTN? It’s looking less eternal these days,
Seems like Ray’s busying with auditioning like he heard what Fox News pays.
If I talk too fast, we can just pretend I’m Father Mike Schmitz with Ascension Presents,
Cuz I really gotta holler, I should put on my collar, maybe I can be your favorite hot priest then!
Did you ever look back and mourn and awake divining comedy?
Climb down and beat the odds? Rise with melodious grit like hominy,
Then make it to be with God? Grab that flow and heat from Dante’s peak?
Hell, I went.
Woke y’all mortals up cuz there ain’t no heaven if I ain’t heaven-sent.
